The tussle between staying true to herself and being the mature woman that should have “adulted” by now. Who knew that would be one of the focal battles that she’d fight in life?
Think about it - did you ever, in the darkest of times, think that you would actually need to fight to be you?
In a world where “this is who I am” is considered a toxic statement, a red flag - it is more often used as a weapon against her. No, she can't be herself, she can't demand to be herself, and she can't expect people to be happy with who she really is.
Society has decided that she is a "work in progress" and it is the same society that leaves her in the lurch expecting her to rise to the occasion and solve all problems because, hey she should be able to, she can - it is only in these times when no one has a problem with the definition of who she is. In fact, this is one of those times when she’ll be penalised, questioned and judged for not being “who she used to be”.
Do the people around realise that they are the ones that broke her spirit? They took away her edge, her opinions and her unique ways of feeling happy - all in the name of societal norms, social relations and world acceptability in general.
They domesticated her.
They dulled her edges.
They clipped her, crippled her.
Now that it’s done, it is time for them to bare their claws - question her sanity, over and over again. Question her self-worth, until there is none left; and then when there is nothing left to wake up for, damn her for not being strong. This is the entertainment society lives for - a well-scripted drama that fills their time, keeps them glued to their couch, inhibiting them from achieving anything. All the while, not letting her achieve anything either.
She is different, she has her own thoughts and her own perspective. Who decided to condemn her for it? Why can't she be “her” and then be there for everyone else as “her”. The reality is, you didn’t want her - you wanted an average and when you couldn’t find that average, you made her into one.
She is not toxic. She is not the problem. You are.
Now only if she could get to this chapter - to this reality and accept it for herself. Maybe she could breathe, maybe she could live.
The fight is real, it is foremost a fight within. So suit up for war - and who said that can't be a saree ;)
Featured illustration: Handwoven kantha cotton, naturally dyed, saree "Midnight Galaxy"